A moment with Joy Joy

Joy Joy dislikes being put into the carseat. She'd be ok initially but the journey always ends up with her crying hysterically.

I think it's claustrophobic for her to be strapped to an unfamiliar place. Maybe the head rest also has something to do with it.

Last night we were traveling home from my place and Joy Joy cried within minutes of being put in the car seat. I sat right beside her and tried everything I could to calm her down, aiming to let her know she wasn't alone and nobody abandoned her in a strange place, rather than hope to get her to stop crying.I sang to her, touched her, stroked her hair, talked to her and used white noise..

At one point she was crying badly and I felt sad so I put my forehead to her head and talked softly to her telling her not to be afraid when I happened to look up to the sky.


There were no stars, it was cloudy but suddenly I saw a perfectly round moon.

And I told joy joy "Joy Joy.. Mummy 陪你看星星.." then I tried "Joy Joy.. 你看有月亮.." after which Daddy passed me his phone to play (nursary) songs for Joy Joy but it went on to play the songs I use to sing and finally I laid my head beside Joy Joy's and told her softly, almost chanting "Joy Joy.. 你看, 今晚有月亮, 有云, 有星星, 有 Joy Joy, 有爸爸, 有妈妈, 还有妈妈喜欢听的歌..."

And gradually she stopped crying.. Looked at the sky whilst i kept telling her the same thing and slowly, she drifted to sleep..

It was a special moment for me, I felt very close to Joy Joy. It was the first time i watched the sky with her whilst we listen to the songs I used to perform very often together. Almost enchanting. Our little family traveling home in the dark, listening to the songs I know so well and love so much. And watching Joy Joy fall asleep in the midst of it all.

Often, the best things in life are accidental.

Where am I?

Joy Joy seems to recognize places, particularly where she sleeps / is put into. She is frightened when she realizes she is in a totally unfamiliar places and cries suddenly like she just got a huge frighten.

I realise I need to introduce places to her when she is awake or active, so that she isn't afraid.

Good and bad. She seems timid in unfamiliar places although she terrorizes in familiar places but hopefully it means she won't just run away with strangers to strange places without crying.. And she cries really hard.

I have hair

Today we tried out the beanie which Daddy ordered for Joy Joy and this is the outcome:

My bucket list

I like it that time goes by the year. After every year you look back and take in all the events, achievements, ups and downs, mentally close a chapter of your life but somehow it flows into your future too.

I watched "The Bucket List" with Daddy during one of our weekly wind-down DVD nights last year and happened to read about someone who took the exact list as her to-do for the new year.

Its a good idea but the list slightly different for me. Something like:

Do something for myself.

Actually I'd like to do 3. Very greedy but essential.

Do something for someone else.

Actually there's just one thing I can do to benefit many people. Maybe Daddy knows what I'm talking about.

But on top of that, I'd like to go on doing what Daddy and I have been doing. Give help.

Over the past few years, we given help to even strangers to the best of our abilities, sometimes even if it's out of the way for us and we've always always found happiness in doing so.

When Joy Joy is old enough, we'll do volunteer work together with her. And teach her to be always willing to help.

Do something that scares the crap out of you.

The only 3 things I can think of now that scares the crap out of me:

Childbirth
Heights
Crocroaches

Do something that everyone else thought you couldn’t do.

It should be to love somebody more than I love myself.

I still love me but I think joy joy is becoming more and more important to me.

Do something you’ll remember when the next new year rolls around.

It's probably going to be the process of bringing JoyJoy up but we never know do we.

Maybe we all need some goals in life to elevate the feeling that we're just going through the motions everyday. Suddenly, the things you do have meaning.




And I think Joy Joy agrees..

Joy Joy 1 Freedom 0

Daddy and I were sitting on the sofa close to midnight on the last day of last year when we heard people counting down and the first thing Daddy said in the new year was :" why am I not drinking somewhere to celebrate the new year..."

"you can just bring joy joy along" I said and i begun to laugh.."put alcohol in her milk bottle and She will be so drunk that she'll be knocked out..." and Daddy begun to laugh hysterically in silence with me.

I can imagine Joy Joy drunk:





I miss my freedom too and I miss it sorely, maybe more than Daddy coz he gets to go out still but how do you not love her?