17 October 2011

One night in KKH

When all the arrangements were made, I changed into a comfy pink KKH nightgown and was wheeled to my ward, with Daddy following closely behind, carrying all our belongings.

We were lucky to be able to get the ward we wanted. Daddy was especially happy about it and majorly proud of himself because it was a super hot night and it made him happy to know i could spend my night in an aircon room, seeing how i always suffered from the heat.

When we reached the ward and the nurses settled some paperwork, I was taken to my bed. Daddy helped me up the bed and tucked me in, checking to see if I was comfortable. When the nurse left, he kissed me on the forehead before starting to put my things in the drawer beside me.

He tested the lock and managed to cause it to jam about 5 seconds after. We stifled our laughs when Daddy told me about it. And then he confessed to the nurse when she came back to measure my blood pressure.

The nurse laughed and said no worries, she can clear it with a master key later on. She went ahead to measure my blood pressure. And then measured it again because it was very low.

She asked if I had been given any medication and when informed that I was given the orange pills to stop contractions, she looked relieved and informed us that the medication could cause low blood pressure. The nurse then asked me not to try and get up or go to the toilet on my own if I don't feel well.

After that she left the room to get the key. Daddy looked at me and told me not to worry, whatever happens I can always count on him to be around. Then he said maybe he should hang around in the hospital until visiting hours the next morning, in case I need him for anything but I know he must be extremely exhausted by then and I told him to go get some rest. "You need to rest to take care of us" I said. Daddy thought about it and agreed. "Visiting hours start at 9am tomorrow, I'll come first thing in the morning".

The nurse came back, reset the drawer and told us Daddy can't stay the night. We said ok and she left us after getting our acknowledgment.

Daddy packed my things in, checked the lock and arranged the iPhone charger so that i can reach it easily. Then he checked my position again to make sure I was comfortable before telling me he had to leave. I said ok and gave him a smile. He kissed my forehead before leaving.

I got these photos from his phone the next day. Before he left, Daddy was worried that he would lose his way the next day and so he took these photos to remind himself:

I was hungry shortly after Daddy left and I just thought to tell him. He said he was still waiting for a cab and asked if I water him to get food for me. I said no, I'd get food from the nurse.

I was texting with Cazz, talking about all the things that happened in the day when I started to feel Joy Joy moving a lot. It was late and we didn't text for a long time. I told her I would try to get some sleep and I'd go comfort Joy Joy as well.

By then the nurse had switched off the lights and I lie there in the dark feeling Joy Joy's movements. It became alarming to me when I realized that she was moving in a way I wasn't used to. As if she was struggling. I thought, maybe she is uncomfortable with my position and so I switched. But she was still kicking me in that alarming way. I decided to press the bell and call for the nurse, all the while wondering about alot of what ifs. What if she was hurt in the accident and is now squirming in pain.. What if this, what if that. They say a mother is supposed to have a feeling about what's wrong but I really just can't tell. It feels so lousy, not knowing what your own baby is feeling.

When the nurse came, she too was alarmed at the way Joy Joy was moving in my tummy. The movements were really crazy.

I was put on the monitoring devices again and Joy Joy kicked even harder. At one point, it hurt so bad, I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I also told the nurse I was hungry. She said it could be because Joy Joy doesn't like the sound of the monitoring device or that she was hungry, so we'll try different things.

She lowered the volume and gave me a cup of Milo with biscuits. Then spoke to Joy Joy, telling her not to hurt mummy in this way.. Mummy is in pain and Joy Joy finally calmed down. It feels lousy when the nurse can calm your baby down and not yourself but I was just glad Joy Joy seemed fine by then. The nurse then left me on the monitor for 30 minutes. I read the papers and was texting with Daddy whilst waiting.

When he reached home, he sent me this photo:

"All of them missed you" he said. And even my pink bedroom slippers missed my hong kong feet:

I told him about what happened just now and showed him the chart as of then:

At one point, Joy Joy's heart beat was so fast, it went off the charts. He said he would charge his phone just in case and maybe he wouldn't sleep.

I told him not worry and that he must sleep. If anything I would call him or the hospital would. So he must try to get some rest, I showed him the picture and updated him only to let him know what's going on. He said ok, he was going to bathe. I was majorly proud of him since I wasn't there to nag at him.

After bathing, he sent me this photo and said he was in bed with the aircon and fan both turned on. It was an extremely hot night and he was so comfortable at home in our bed:

We discussed the things he needed to bring the next day and asked each other to get some sleep. But, that night, I really couldn't sleep. I had to somehow try. Joy Joy was moving as usual again but this time more normally..

I kept seeing the last few seconds of the crash replay in my head but I told her not to be bad tempered like me and to think about how Daddy would be. Kind, gentle and loving, imagining this all time favorite photo of Daddy:

I stoked what I believe to be Joy Joy's back / bum whilst thinking happier thoughts. Finally.. The two of us fell asleep...

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...